Forum Flashback: 1981

We continue our series of Forum Flashbacks with this article from the October 1981 edition of the Forum written by alumnus Jim Shapiro ’83.

Last of a Dying Breed

An American tradition, a sub-culture thriving for years beneath the social mainstream, is becoming extinct before our eyes and we are unable to do anything about it.  Like the blue whale and the Bengal tiger, this species is disappearing at such an alarming rate that there may be none left by the turn of the century.  I am speaking, of course, of the Computer Nerd.

I’m sure you know (or at least knew) one or two Computer Nerds.  Every school has a few.  You’d see them marching, android-like, down the halls, polyester pants a little too short, pens bobbing in the pockets of the J.C. Penny short-sleeve button down shirts.  No one would ever talk to them, except possibly to ask about math homework.  They would tell jokes that were not funny at all, and would laugh mechanically for several minutes afterward.  They listened to no music, only watched Star Trek reruns on T.V., and had no visible interest in girls whatsoever.  They played no physical sports; their only recreation was computer games.  This proved, in the end, to be their ultimate downfall.

It started with Pong.  (Anyone remember Pong?)  A few race car games soon became available.  Everyone bought Pong for their T.V. at home.  Then burst the floodgates:  Space Invaders, Grand Prix, Asteroids, Galaxian, Missile Command, Monaco GP, Defenders.  Everyone loved video games.  On their way home from work, businessmen began to stop into Rubus Gameroom or Times Square to play their favorites.  Soon, everyone began getting Ataris, Magnavoxes, Intellivisions, or even TRS-80’s for Christmas.

Finally came Pac-man, the first really cute computer game; even girls, notorious video haters, liked it.  Now Joe and Suzy average could stroll into a bar and play Pac-Man while they got drunk.  This killed the Computer Nerds.  Formerly unique in their love for video games, they now had to share their beloved software with others.  They stopped polishing their inch-thick glasses, stopped shining their ridiculous pseudo-leather shoes.  Their numbers dwindled as video’s popularity grew. Soon, they ceased appearing on the street at all.

What has America come to?  Are we so heartless that we can drive this once flourishing breed back in to their dimly-lit little rooms?  No!  No, I say, America!  Let’s make a sacrifice!  Let’s shut down Rubus!  Let’s give video back to the Nerds!  And let us all wait for the day when Nerds can once more put on their brown socks and part their unwashed hair straight across the top of their heads and march, like crazed robots, in safety on the wide sunny streets of this country we all know and love.